Gossip. Something that everyone seems to enjoy. We all talk, we all keep secrets and guess what even though you think the gossip won’t hurt others or you say you don’t care, well you should.
Ask yourself: Why do you gossip, does it make you feel better cutting someone down? Why do you think its okay to talk about someone you barely know? Do you think everything you are saying is true? Do you ever think about the person you are talking about and how it affects them?
Probably when you are gossiping about others, these things are not running through your mind. But you have absolutely no idea what your words could do to someone. I know this because I was recently gossiped about. If I wanted to lie to the whole world and say hearing those things didn’t hurt, I would but sometimes even the strong girls cry.
Recently, many things have been gossiped about me. I have heard what a good friend actually spread about me and how she continue to tell the people in this world that would like nothing but to watch me fail. The words I heard have undoubtedly hurt.
I think the hardest part about being gossiped about is:
- It can be started by someone who you trust
- It can be spread by people that know absolutely nothing about the person you are
“Never gossip. Gossip is a normally based on lies and someone wanting to feel better about themselves by hurting someone else.”
The gossip and rumors were not even true and that is what hurts the most. People talked about me like they had the business too. Gossip hurts. And I will tell it from my perspective because what people don’t realize when they share secrets or spread stuff about others what it can really do to someone. My story is very small compared to what many people go through daily.
“If it’s not your story to tell, you don’t tell it.”
Once I started hearing what was said I went straight to the source, once she lied to my face about saying anything, all I felt was betrayed, I felt as though how can you really trust anyone. But I decided God was trying to show me who I really needed in my life and who I didn’t. As gossip continued to grow all I felt was embarrassed, embarrassed that people would actually believe any of that stuff. I remember walking into a place and people starting to whisper about me, I remember hearing people tell me they were told not to talk to me and I remember driving home multiple times from places crying. I remember coming home to having my roommate have to comfort me. I felt like I didn’t belong anymore and I just didn’t understand why God was doing this to me. I was trying to figure out how girls could be so mean to someone they knew nothing about. I cried for days, tried to moved (yes, literally leave the state) and tried to stay away from everyone because I honestly did not know what else to do.
I was one of the lucky ones though because I have the most amazing true friends, family and a very strong faith in the Lord. Through all my tears and embarrassment I had the support from those around me who truly know me. Even with this it still doesn’t change the fact that some people had no problem sharing information about me. The damage was done but guess what I bet these people don’t even know the damage that was caused. First off the gossip divided friends, made me lose a good friend and made me feel absolutely worthless which no one should ever feel. It made me reevaluate a lot of things and it was a long process.
I did however learn though that in the past when I would gossip, how it could affect others and how I did not want that anymore. I have changed my ways to make sure I do not do the same to others because I know the feeling. It hurts, it brings emotions you did not want to have. So next time you want to gossip about someone, share information about someone you barely know, make sure you think about this and how it can affect someone. It hurts more than you realize.
Now, have you ever been gossiped about? How did you make it through this hard time? Just know we all have these moments and it is our job to stop.
I know very well how you feel Lisa! It’s very hard knowing people are saying hurtful things about you, especially those you love. I went through this firsthand when I was pregnant; it was really, really difficult to tune out what horrible things my friends and family said about me behind closed doors (and to my face as well!). But remember that even people you love make mistakes, and though no one ever deserves it, always forgive as God forgives us! This is His way of teaching you compassion for others; next time you hear gossip, you have the chance to speak kind words to someone else about it instead of malicious ones. There’s always room to improve- and in the end, all you can do is use your misfortune to create yourself into a better person.
So many people love you and think you’re awesome! Hold your head high!