Why is gray now my least favorite color? Besides I absolutely hate the gray area of any type of relationship with someone. We all know that our generation has this awful hook up culture. You have a better chance at finding a leprechaun strolling down fifth avenue than you do of finding a man that is willing to commit to a relationship. And ladies, let’s be real, we are too tired of being misled or hurt to settle for anything less. But time and time again we find ourselves in the gray area. Many of you have been in the position or have watched your friends, when you settle for a hook up just so you can feel wanted or to have a warm body next to you and then within a few minutes or hours of that person leaving, you’re back to feeling crappy.

Why do time and time again, do we allow ourselves to be in situations we always end up hating afterwards. We have all said that we don’t care it’s just for fun but how the guy treats you after always makes things different. Gray is a color that needs to be non existence and only left with white or black. In any gray situation, women seem to always in lose. Since when is just sex satisfying for any extended amount of time? Giving it up to someone just to have what you want for a little while is just a band-aid. It covers the loneliness for a little while but he is never going to give you more than that, ever.

Never Use a Boy as your Band-Aid

Calls or texts for him to come over to provide some satisfaction will eventually go unanswered. If you are friends on social media, you’ll see him out with buddies and more often than not pinned between two or more randoms that you can assume he will take home. Or maybe if you’re lucky he will just fall off the face of the Earth and you will never see him again. Regardless, the lack of his response will make that wound that you tried to cover earlier grow even bigger. You’re going to feel like real crap. The lowest of the low and you might just roll out to the bar to find another band-aid.

Guess what? It’s not going to end. The gray area is growing into a huge abyss that is swallowing souls as we speak. So choose a side. The black side entails you waiting for someone who will commit to you. That will be someone who is worthwhile and won’t just call you when they want to hook up. The black side is where you spend time together outside the bedroom. You go out in public together. Holy crap he might even ask you on a date. Wow, when is the last time that happened? The black side is where you go when you are ready. But first you need to visit the white side.

The white side is where you focus on yourself.

You don’t need a sexual partner to make you feel whole. You don’t need them to make you feel sexy or wanted or valued. You can do that all yourself. Does your bed get lonely? Buy a body pillow. Do you have emotional needs that don’t feel met? It is within you to solve that. You are your own remedy. You aren’t going to find it elsewhere. If you feel inadequate, use your energy to do something about it. If you don’t feel sexy, figure out what you can do to make yourself feel sexy. You could start a workout routine, buy new clothes or hire a photographer to do a private photo shoot. No one has to know because it’s your journey alone. The white side focuses on you fixing you. Find out who you are and what you want and need then go out and make it happen.

Gray Isn’t My Favorite Color

Just as gray isn’t my favorite color, I know many women out there feel the same way. The gray area is self defeating. Respect yourself enough to get out of the gray area and never ever look back. Once you figure out what is missing and you fix it on your own, you will be happy, black or white without the gray color in your life anymore.

By Contributor Writer: Layla McKinley