Today I met a yogi buddy for coffee at the local Starbucks where we talked non-stop for almost three hours, we hadn’t seen each other for a while.
I remained at our table after she left and took a deep breath of gratitude. For the great cup of coffee we shared, the stories we shared, and intense feeling of meeting a kinder soul. She may be old enough to be my mother, but she’s my friend and she’s beautiful. Having this time with her and enjoying this amazing friendship that blossomed during our teacher training, made me realize I have hit the friendship jackpot in my life.
The last few years, cultivating self-love has been high on my priority list.
I didn’t realize how greatly the friendships in my life had affected my self love until taking some time to reflect after I graduated college. Taking friendship more seriously and realizing the impact they had on me lead me to leaving some friendships for ones that were more valuable.
Looking back, it’s been one of the best things I have ever done for myself and for my friendships.
Yesterday, a friend called me to say hello with her adorable niece. I missed the call so they left a sweet message that brought a smile to my face. We caught up later to share some struggles and annoyances we were currently dealing with. Getting a casual catch up call isn’t something everyone gets.
I’ve been playing phone tag with two amazing women that I get to call my friends. And although it’s been too long wince we have talked and even seen each other, my life wouldn’t be right without them. I’m so grateful for them.
Two of my friends that live in different states were home for Thanksgiving this year. We met at the local bar and laughed until we had each other in tears. That hasn’t changed since high school were we all met.
Distance has changed our lives but not our friendships, thank God.
I now get the privilege of working with one of my most joyful friends. We wit together in meetings like we used to sit together in class and scribble notes on each others papers. I never thought we would get to relive those memories together but here we are.
I don’t have any sisters, but I do have a friend that I fight with like we’re siblings and she has my back like family. We’ve worked together, we’ve played together, I have as many memories with her as I do with my only sibling. So I have that going for me.
I have many friends I haven’t talked to in months or even a year, sadly, but if I bumped into them at a restaurant or the bank I’d give them a hug smiling and ask how they are.
It’s been a long time since I have had a ‘bad’ friend, years probably. Thankfully that is due to the wonder-full friend list I have to brag about. I don’t have time for the drama, the flakey friends, the energy suckers like I used to in my youth. I know what I need in a friend and I know what I offer as a friend, and I don’t settle any more.
It has not been easy ending some of those friendships I use to settle for or just letting them fizzle out but that’s okay.
Some things are only meant to last for a certain amount of time before it’s time to move on to the next moment. But the friendships we make last our lifetime deserve to be celebrated and cherished.
When was the last time you took a minute to cherish a friendship? Who have you taken for granted lately?
It’s so easy (and normal) to get caught up in life and forget how much we need our friends to stay balanced.
Give someone a catch up call today or text them and set up some plans. Spend more time with friends that build you up, share your struggles and are still there at the end of a disagreement. Be with the ones that challenge you and grow with you, even if you grow in different ways. Be around the friends you are your true self with, that you can let your guard down with, and that don’t stress you out.
Being in fulfilling relationships add so much to life especially friendships.
Make time for them today and everyday. And just like a bad relationship, don’t be afraid to leave a bad friendship.
Check out more of Madalyn’s articles on The Odyssey Online Self Love Beauty community.