For as long as I can remember, I’ve always worried about what other people think about me.
I’ve always been a people pleaser, and as I’m sure you can imagine, it’s a very unfulfilling habit. No matter what you do, there will always be someone who doesn’t like it, doesn’t approve it, thinks it’s weird, or thinks it’s silly. It gets pretty exhausting when you’re always trying to make everyone happy.
In addition, people think about what you do a lot less than you think. We are all so hyper aware and hypercritical of ourselves that we assume everyone else will feel the same way.
More than 75% of the time, other people aren’t even paying attention. We tend to twist other people’s words and actions and make ourselves believe that they are saying negative about us or that they are judging us. While there obviously will be times in life where people are doing this, the vast majority of the time, they aren’t.
And, even if they are, why does it matter?
When I was in middle school and high school, I constantly worried about people thinking I was weird or too different. I tried my hardest to just fit in. Now in my twenties, I have learned to embrace my quirks and I’ve learned that if someone thinks negatively of me for just being myself, than I probably don’t want to be friends with them.
With more than 7 billion people on Earth, I assure you that there are much better people available to surround yourself with than people who don’t appreciate you.
We notice so many things about ourselves that others will never notice. From that out of place hair, to the new jeans size, to what brand of bag you’re carrying, to the slightly uneven makeup you have on, most of the time, no one will even notice. I’ve even noticed that on days where I thought everyone would think I looked bad, I’ve gotten compliments.
We see ourselves in such a different light than everyone else does, and I promise you that most of the time, people don’t have a negative opinion of you, and even if they do, their negative opinion shouldn’t dictate how you live your life.
We can’t make everyone happy, so let’s focus on making the most important person happy – ourselves.